90-to-40: Sticktoitivenessless.

Day 48:

I don't know why, but typing "Day 48" causes me to pause. I'm almost halfway through this project and haven't missed a day of posting, even on days like today when I'm ready to collapse in a mangled pile of smouldering wreckage. I'm proud of myself for sticking to it.

Once again, I've removed the option to fail. I "will" write every day is a mandate.  There is no alternative. A couple of years ago I took the same approach to running. I completed a 7 week training schedule and ran a 5k. In the process I lost over 50 lbs.

Guess what. I stuck to it for a while, but at least 35 lbs are back... and I'm not running.

I don't want that to happen to my passion for writing. Not to mention,  I need to be more consistent with exercise. It seems I do well with a plan... just not once the plan is over.

So... I guess I need to join the military or something so I can become more regimented? Im not being lazy. I'm constantly doing things.

Learn self discipline? Well, I have a lot of discipline with some things, so I know what to do. I'm just not doing it.

Or, maybe I need to get hypnotized? But I'm afraid I'll end up barking every time someone snaps their fingers.

As a part of this project, I want to learn the skill of lifelong sticktoitiveness. A balanced and realistic approach to motivation has to be out there. But, where?

Any ideas?

90-to-40: Using up today

Day 49:

There is something about being exhausted at the end of the day that's rewarding. I've been working full days at my job, then working in the evening on a new front walkway. I'm downright exhausted.

I haven't stopped since I got up this morning... and I almost can't keep my eyes open to type this message. You'd think it would be frustrating, but I feel blessed to have a job that exhausts my brain with creativity and planning, and to have the ability to make my home more comfortable - inside and out.

The best part is that I'll sleep tonight with the knowledge that I was productive and creative all day. And though there were no grand revelations about life today, I can rest peacefully with the knowledge that I used today up. I gave it my all... and that's enough.